Mastering Mealtimes
Module 2: Setting Your Body up for Success

Balancing Extras - Sweets, Treats & Sugars

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Balancing Extras -

Sweets, Treats & Sugars

25 MINUTE READ

Published June 2024

AUTHOR

Megan Lyons
Owner of Lyons’ Share Wellness, Double Board Certified as a Clinical Nutritionist and Holistic Nutritionist & Doctorate of Clinical Nutrition (Cand)

According to the Centers for Disease Control, today day one in five children between 2 and 19 in the U.S. are currently obese, a 2x increase since the same population in 1990. While obesity is caused by a variety of factors, diet plays a large role. This guide provides families with an approach for extras - to stay healthy while still having fun!

Are you in a constant battle with your child over the extras?

The good news is…you’re not alone. Our food source in the U.S. makes it hard for anyone, much less a child, to avoid sweets, treats and sugars (i.e. the “extras”.) They’re in almost everything, everywhere. Plus - they taste good, and they’re fun! This makes your job as a parent so much harder.

Don’t get us wrong…there is a time and a place for "extras," but we want to avoid having extras as a staple in our routines and in our homes.

Here, we'll develop strategies for managing extras in your child's diet to promote a balanced approach to nutrition while still having some fun every now and then. Said differently…the best defense is a good offense. We want to teach your child to love whole foods from a young age so that they naturally gravitate and feel satisfied from eating the foods with real nutritional value (while still enjoying the extras every once in a while too!)

Without a strategy, you'll constantly feel pulled between indulgence and restriction, creating mental tension, power struggles, and suboptimal behaviors.  We’ll show how you can incorporate extras mindfully while still prioritizing nutrient-dense foods to support your child's health and fostering a positive relationship with food for your family.

Breaking it down

It's essential to recognize that extras, such as sweets, processed snacks, and fried foods, can be enjoyed in moderation as part of a balanced diet.

By framing these foods as occasional treats (what we call “extras”) rather than forbidden indulgences, you can help your child develop a healthy attitude towards eating and prevent feelings of deprivation.  We don't want to make a huge deal of having them or avoiding them ... most times, they're not there, and sometimes, they are.  We want to avoid labeling foods as "good" or "bad" (or inserting your own preferences for food) and instead focus on moderation and balance. Help your child understand that all foods can fit into a healthy diet when enjoyed in appropriate portions and frequency.

Here are some practical tips to “set” your orientation (and your child’s):

  • We each have our own relationship with food - learned behaviors & preferences that we develop over time starting from a very young age. Research shows that early experience with food influences taste preference in adulthood, particularly for sweet tastes. To help shape these early experiences positively, it’s important to reconcile our own relationship with food and understand our own conscious and subconscious tendencies. If we run to the pantry every time we feel stressed or grab a handful of chocolate in a moment of frustration, our kids learn to model the behavior and self-soothe with food as they see us doing.  Children learn by example and are eager to imitate their parents as role models. Being mindful of our own eating behaviors and attitudes is crucial to educating our children in how to do so themselves.  Teach your child to tune in to their hunger and fullness cues and eat mindfully, even when enjoying extras.  Ultimately, we want our children to view food primarily as fuel, not as a coping mechanism.

    Encouraging them to mindfully consume helps them develop this behavior. 

  • Take the opportunity to educate your child about the nutritional value of different foods, including extras. Ask them how they feel after more sugary foods, and help them become aware if they get moody, tired, or have a tummy ache.  You can share your experience, too! This knowledge empowers children to make informed choices and develop lifelong healthy eating habits. Showing excitement over your favorite foods, even when (and especially when!) they’re on the healthier end of the spectrum, is another great strategy. Show that you consider plump summer strawberries or a pan of freshly roasted vegetables as a treat to yourself, so that your kids see positive emotions around all types of food. 

  • Encourage non-food-related ways to celebrate special occasions and achievements. Instead of relying on treats as rewards or incentives, celebrate with activities like a family movie night, a trip to the park, a fun toy, or a special outing. Similarly, find creative ways to swap out less healthy extras for nutritious alternatives. For example, offer veggies and hummus instead of chips or candy during at-home movie nights, or make homemade fruit popsicles using pureed fruit and yogurt instead of store-bought ice cream in the summer. 

What the research says

Managing extras in your child's diet, and your own diet, are crucial for promoting overall health and well-being. Nearly one in five children between 2 and 19 in the U.S. are currently obese, a statistic that has quadrupled since the 1960s.  The body mass index of a child’s parents is the most consistent predictor of a child’s BMI, and research shows that a parent’s eating behavior directly influences that of their children. Thus, helping the whole family get healthy together is essential.

We are facing an uphill battle, as sugar, one of the strongest predictors of obesity, is added to a vast majority of packaged foods available today.  Sadly, chips and sodas are easier to access than fresh vegetables and fruits in many parts of the country (as well as at many schools and birthday parties). Our bodies are hard-wired to crave sugar, as evolutionarily, sugars were so scarcely available that it made sense to load up (and pack on storage fat) whenever we could find them.

Today, with the prevalence of sugar, we need to overcome that tendency to overcompensate, and try to enjoy extras in moderation.  Our goal is to find the right balance for our physical health and the physical health of our children, while also setting them up to make healthy choices naturally and without shame or guilt.  We do this by helping them understand the nutritional value of food and modeling healthy behaviors ourselves. 

By striking a balance between nutritious foods and treats, you can help prevent nutritional deficiencies while also minimizing the risk of excessive calorie intake and weight gain. Additionally, fostering a healthy relationship with food early on sets the stage for lifelong habits that support physical and emotional wellness. Teaching your child to enjoy treats in moderation and make balanced food choices empowers them to take control of their health and make informed decisions about their diet as they grow.

What balance might look like for your family

  • Do more

    1) Ask your child questions about their experience with food to encourage their awareness of taste, texture, and satisfaction.

    2) Display a positive attitude towards healthy food. Feel free to express enjoyment, just as you would with any other food or pleasurable experience.

    3) Create boundaries and then let your child make choices - if you are serving sweets, serve them alongside the main meal and let your child choose what they eat without judgment. Over the long term, your child will choose the healthy path.

    Try to do less

    1) Avoid labeling foods as “treats,” “cheat food,” or "good" and "bad," which can lead to moral feelings associated with food and subsequently feelings of guilt or shame around eating. These types of moral associations with food can lead to disordered eating later in life.

    2) Avoid using treats as rewards or punishments, which can create unhealthy associations with food.

    3) Be aware of your facial expressions and remarks as your child consumes food - what you say and how you behave matters!

    4) Avoid distractions during mealtime, such as screens or toys, which can lead to mindless eating and overconsumption. Try family games like "roses & thorns" or other fun activities you can play at the dinner table

  • Do more

    1) Teach children about the nutritional value of different foods and how to make informed choices about their diet. When enjoying chicken, comment on how protein helps make us strong. When enjoying broccoli, comment on how fiber helps our digestion. Having benefits to attach to healthy foods helps kids want them more.

    2) Swap out less healthy extras for nutritious alternatives, such as homemade snacks or healthier versions of favorite treats.

    3) Praise your child for making “good choices for their body”

    Try to do less

    1) Avoid overwhelming children with too much information or imposing strict rules, which may lead to power struggles and/or resistance.

    2)Limit packaged "health foods," which may still contain added sugars or unhealthy ingredients. Have fun creating options together in the kitchen.

    3) Dont make a big deal out of extras - they are just another type of food that we occasionally consume.

  • Do more

    1) Emphasize moderation and balance when it comes to enjoying extras, rather than strict deprivation or restriction.

    2) Serve sweets regularly in appropriate quantities (1-3 times per week) - create a routine that incorporates the extras proactively and in a healthy environment (e.g. alongside a healthy meal). Dont make it a big deal, and let your child make choices about how much they eat.

    3) Offer non-food-related ways to celebrate special occasions and achievements, such as activities or quality time together. The #1 thing your child wants is your time - this is a great opportunity to give it to them! Other incentives may look like: a toy they’ve been lusting after, opportunity to watch a short amount of their favorite show, or a fun excursion!

    Try to do less

    1) Avoid “scarcity” mindset or restricting access to treats completely, as this may lead to cravings and overindulgence when treats are available.

    2) Avoid using food as the sole focus of celebrations, which can reinforce emotional eating habits.

    3) Never withhold food as a punishment - we don't want to associate food with morality.

About the author

Megan Lyons

Doctor of Clinical Nutrition (cand), Board Certified Clinical and Holistic Nutritionist


As owner of her own wellness business, Megan has completed over 12,000 hours of 1-to-1 nutrition consulting, spoken on hundreds of stages, and reached hundreds of thousands through her…

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When to get
expert support

If you think you need expert support, this is a great reason to pop into office hours. Sometimes you might need more support, and that's okay!

  • Your child talks incessantly about food you consider an extra,  seems to ruminate on the idea of sugar or processed foods or is sneaking “extras” in private.

  • If you or your partner currently or previously struggled with unhealthy or disordered eating - we’re here for you!

  • You have started the process of labeling foods "good" and "bad" or have existing habits that are difficult to unwind.

Have a question for your Coach?

Schedule time during their weekly office hours! We know not all questions come up on a schedule, which is why your Coach is also available outside of the sessions included in your Program.

🤸 Nicely done…you’re making this look easy! 🤸